You learn a lot from your kids. It’s just the way it is in life.
There are so many things that I love to soak up from them, but the one thing that I’ve never really thought about is how they see us as a married couple. I know they know me as mom. I know they know Matt as dad. I know they know how we are as parents together. I know I’m the “easy” one and Dad’s the “tough” one (or so I’ve been told!).
I’ve just never really thought about what they think of us as a couple.
I happened to see my 5 year old daughter snapping photos of us last night at our sons’ flag football game. We were sitting there talking and laughing and watching the boys play. It was just a normal moment for us. It was just a normal thing for us to do together. She then started telling us to look at her and pose, so we obliged! It was a cute thing for her to do.
But then I got home last night and saw the photos on my phone and I started to tear up.
My daughter… in just a few split seconds caught us. The real us. The couple us.
Not just as mom and dad, but as Audrey and Matt. The 2 college sweethearts that fell in love back in 1998.
The Audrey and Matt that fell madly in love and couldn’t live without each other so they got married at 23 and 26 years old. The Audrey and Matt who would stay up for hours at night talking on the phone when we did the distance thing for a year. The Audrey and Matt who used to write love notes to each other and (gasp) mail them. They Audrey and Matt who love to hold hands and say “I love you” about 100 times a day to each other. The Audrey and Matt who loved each other so much, they wanted to start a family as soon as possible.
The Audrey and Matt who love to be with each other and laugh and be silly. I want my kids to know these people. I want my kids to see these people and really know how lucky they are to be part of this love and this happiness.
Sometimes you need to see things through your child’s eyes to see what’s there. I want my kids to always believe that love exists. I want my kids to always know that true love is out there. I want my kids to know that friendship is important. I want my kids to see us holding hands and giggling with each other, always.
These “little” things are so important for kids to see. My daughter wanted to capture us on a football field, but what she didn’t realize was that she was capturing love. She was capturing love at its realest and rawest form because there is nothing special about these photos… we’re blurry in half of them, we’re in random clothes, we’re sweaty, we’re exhausted… but we’re HAPPY. Victoria captured happiness and she didn’t even realize it because it’s just normal to her. It’s something she sees every single day and I’m happy about that, I want her to believe that that’s the norm.
And not just her, my sons, too.
Take a moment with your kids to make sure your kids are seeing your happiness and your love story. Talk to them about it. Share with them how you met. Let them hear you say “I love you” to your partner. Let your kids see true love and happiness alive and well in their lives.
It will – hopefully – be one of the greatest lessons in life you can teach them.