This is a post I’ve started in my head about a hundred times over the last 2 weeks, but just haven’t been able to sit down and write it yet. Even as I sit here now, I have tears streaming down my cheeks. Joyful tears. Happy tears. Content tears.
I’m writing about my daughter. My girl.
My Victoria.
My precious, beautiful Victoria.
Everyone keeps asking me how she is, and I can’t say anything but… “perfect.” She is my perfect being.
After having my 4 beautiful boys, we decided to try for another baby in March of 2012. We had just come off 6 weeks of our lives that were the most difficult for us in the world. Matt had a cancerous tumor removed and we just wanted to celebrate life. We knew we weren’t done yet having babies… so we were excited and anxious to try for another. I found out on July 11th, 2012 that I was pregnant. I was ecstatic! Coincidentally, my best friend Vera had found out 2 weeks prior that she was pregnant, too! We were both so over the moon to be pregnant together. Sadly, I miscarried that baby… it was devastating to me. We had wanted it so badly, and it was tough to realize it wasn’t going to happen.
As SOON as I got the green light to try again, we did. We found out on Halloween – October 31, 2012 – that I was pregnant. I was so excited, but SO nervous. I just wanted everything to be healthy and perfect for us.
As soon as we announced I was pregnant, the questions starting pouring in, “Do you think it’s a GIRL?”
In all honesty, I was positive it was a boy. I just didn’t care what the sex would be, I just wanted healthy. I remember going into that appointment and saying to Matt, “I’ll ask what it is after they do the full scan.” When they told us on February 13th, 2013 that it was a GIRL, I was speechless. I honestly couldn’t believe it. I just remember looking at my husband and saying, “It’s a GIRL.”
I always dreamed of what it would be like to have a daughter.
Would she look like me?
Would she sound like me?
Would she be my best little friend?
Would she have my style?
Would she be tall like her father?
Would she have blonde hair like her brothers?
Would she be a swimmer?
These were all questions to dream about and ponder, they were never “real” questions that I actually got to ask myself.
And then… all of a sudden, these questions became real.
I can’t quite express in words about how much I love my Victoria. She’s mine. She looks like me. She has long legs, from her father. She has blonde hair. She has blue eyes. She has big hands and feet just like her brothers. She’s just the cutest little thing you’ve ever seen. And she’s mine. She’s my daughter.
The minute I locked eyes with my daughter, a peacefulness came over me. She was here. She was finally here. We had waited a long time for this beautiful little pink bundle. And it was amazing to think that all the generations to be before us brought us to that very moment on Tuesday, July 9th, 2013 at 11:06AM.
I look at my daughter and I still have to pinch myself.
She is my everything. And just like her brothers are to me… she is my life. My love. My heart. My soul.
She is the completion of our family. She was what we were waiting for… the story of our family, she was waiting all along, just waiting for the perfect time to enter our lives.
To see my sons fawn all over her.
To see my husband putty in her hands.
To see my grandmother see herself in her.
To see it all… it’s everything I dreamed it would be and much, much more.
My sweet little Victoria. I will tell you every single day how much I love you. I will tell you every single day how much you were wanted. I will tell you every single day how beautiful you are. I will tell you every single day that Nana Flo helped send you to us.
On having a daughter.
It is a dream come true for me.
And… even more, this little girl is the luckiest girl in the world to have these 4 brothers hanging on her every word (well… sound right now).
xo
Love this, Audrey!! Congrats to your family on this precious little bundle. She is perfect!
Audrey,
I am so happy for you and of course this post brought me to tears. I have loved following you (for years) but reading everything the last few weeks. I feel exactly the same way you do after welcoming my Lilah Hope into the world in May. I have one boy (same age as Henry) and my world and heart have been so filled with the daughter that I have been praying for. I always just smile at your comments because I can totally relate. Blessings to you and your beautiful family. Welcome to the world, Victoria!
Audrey, this was one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. Thank you so much for sharing with us — Victoria is so lucky to have you for her mom!
Wonderful. Daughters are very special and sons instantly become her great protectors.
What an emotional, incredible post that gives me such hope. We’ve been trying since March 2012 to have our third and as frustrated as I am, and as sad as I’ve been, that our efforts thus far have resulted in a miscarriage, an ectopic (with loss of tube) and, just last month, an early miscarriage, reading this post gives me the courage to keep trying, to not give up, so I can experience this true, pure joy once more. So happy for you and your entire family! xoxo
What a beautiful post! I look at Victoria in your arms and my heart melts. She is wonderfully and perfectly made. God has truly blessed your family with this Princess. Gods timing is perfect!
Reading this in tears (happy tears!) as I am 28 weeks pregnant with my own little girl. Thank you for sharing & congrats on your beautiful miracle!
With the tears running down my cheeks at the perfection of your words, I couldn’t be happier for you if I tried. Victoria has no idea what a lucky little girl she is to be born into your amazing family. xoxo
I am so so so so happy for you!! xoxo
So very happy for you and your precious family. She is just beautiful and you are all truly blessed.
Beautiful post, Audrey…and gorgeous picture. 🙂 Congratulations to you and your family — she’s beautiful!
<3
This was beautiful and I love following your new journey with a little girl added to the mix.
What a moving post. You brought me to tears. Your complete family is gorgeous. Thank you for always sharing the innermost thoughts with us. Always be this happy!
What a touching post. As a mother of two boys, I really feel like I can connect with you (you’ve described how I imagine I would feel if I ever have a little girl). Thank you for this beautiful post – I enjoyed every word of it!
Beautiful … congratulations Audrey!
Tears of joy for you Audrey. I don’t have to tell you to enjoy every moment bc clearly you are!
Oh Audrey-this post was just beautiful! I love the picture. Thanks for sharing.
xoxo-G
couldn’t be happier for you all. she is PERFECT! love you all and i’m just crying reading this post feeling your joy. xoxoxo
I’ve been loving your YouTube videos throughout your entire pregnancy, and seeing the resulting GORGEOUS baby girl is just too sweet.
And yes, little girls are very, very special! 🙂
Happy for you, Audrey!
Having a daughter is truly a gift…I know because I have three wonderful ones. 😉
What a beautiful little girl and a beautiful girl. Congrats Audrey!