The moment Christmas begins…

There’s the decking the halls, the hustling and bustling, the lists and more lists, the visits, the wrapping, and of course, the food.

But there is a moment for each of us when Christmas really begins. For me, it is the moment I step into Mrs. Couture’s kitchen on the morning of Christmas Eve Day. That is always the moment my mind settles into the true wonder, the magic and the spiritual peace of this most special time. It is the moment of my heart…

My story with Mrs. Couture goes back twenty years, when Audrey was 11 years old and in 5th grade.  Audrey’s teacher had the wonderful idea to connect each one of her students with a senior citizen pen pal from our town… the objective being a real and true generational connection to a person who experienced the history and science and technology as it happened.  The 5th graders would write letters to their pen pals about what they were learning in school, what they were doing in their lives and often ask those wonderful questions about “the olden days.”  The senior citizen pen pals would write about their childhoods, their families, and answer those wonderful questions about “the olden days.”  It was a perfect assignment. Audrey was connected with Mrs. Couture, a beautiful lady who wrote beautiful letters.  Mrs. Couture had grown up in the town next to ours and moved to our town when she was a young bride.  Mrs. Couture was 75 years old when her correspondence with Audrey began, so she had great stories to tell about the world and its history.  She had great wisdom and a wonderful way of telling her stories.

On the first Christmas-Time of this correspondence, Mrs. Couture suffered the tragedy of the death of her only son… her only child.  Her only heir.  He was 46 years old.  He died just before Christmas. This was Audrey’s first time being touched by the death of someone so close to someone she knew, and she was tentative and frightened about what to do and what to say.  On Christmas Eve Day, we made our visit to Mrs. Couture at her home… with a basket of bagels and fruit.  Mrs. Couture greeted Audrey with the grace of an angel… with a hug that is locked into my mind.  I remember Mrs. Couture’s face as she smiled through her unthinkable pain and bent down to touch Audrey’s face and thank her for her kindness.  I remember Mr. Couture standing behind Mrs. Couture, broken to his soul. I remember people coming in and out of their lovely home… all decorated for the holidays… and I will always remember the grace with which Mrs. Couture shook hands or hugged or nodded thankfully at the people, the friends, the neighbors who came that morning.

Mrs. Couture is the very definition of grace.  Her face, her voice, her walk, her embrace, her smile. And her writing.  Mrs. Couture and Audrey continued their most blessed correspondence all that year… that year that taught Audrey much more than her 5th grade teacher could ever have imagined.  Audrey learned from Mrs. Couture about life and love and tenacity and endurance…

From that Christmas Eve Day on, we have visited Mrs. Couture on every Christmas Eve Day.  Yesterday was our 20th year.  Audrey came with Barry and me for many, many of those years, right through college.  The last few years, it’s just been Barry and me.  We always drive in the driveway… often times it is still crunchy with snow, as it was yesterday… and we see Mrs. Couture peek out from her kitchen window.  Her smile is always glorious as she opens her door and she is always impeccably dressed for her guests. She always says the same thing as her voice catches the Christmas-Time joy in the air… “Oh, I am so happy you came!  I wasn’t sure you’d make it this year!”  She embraces each of us for a long, long, precious moment, and I see the little gift she has ready for us from the corner of my eye… beautifully wrapped and labeled and sitting on her kitchen table… with all the gifts she has chosen for the many people who come.

Yes, this is the moment Christmas begins for me.  In Mrs. Couture’s kitchen, surrounded with dozens and dozens of Christmas cards from wonderful friends and neighbors… lovely Christmas decorations… and those little gifts for the people she “wasn’t” expecting!

Mrs. Couture is now 95 years old.  She still decorates her home.  She still has the eggnog and brandy ready.  She still thinks of everyone who may/will drop by for a Christmas visit.  And she still drives! Many things have changed over these 20 years.  Our homes were at one time about a 5 minute ride.  Then we moved to the next town and our ride was about 15 minutes.  Now we live on “the other side of the bridge” (for you Rhode Islanders out there!) and our ride is about 30 minutes or so.  Mr. Couture passed away 8 years ago.  And we learned yesterday that Irene, Mr. Couture’s sister and a staple at our visits until she became too ill to travel from Maryland to Rhode Island for the holidays, passed away a few weeks ago.

But what we have learned from Mrs. Couture is all about grace.  All about Christmas and the spirit of Christmas. All about the simplest kindnesses in a smile, a hug, a cup of eggnog.  All about sharing what she has.  All about angels on earth.  All about listening… truly listening… and remembering.  Mrs. Couture met Flo many, many times at Barry’s printing company, and she spent much time asking Barry about how he was doing with his Mom’s passing.  Mrs. Couture remembers everything… because she cares to. Mrs. Couture passes grace from one person to another to another to another… positive energy, love, joy for life and grace all wrapped up in her tiny but formidable self.

Sometimes God sends people to us in the most interesting of ways.  And yes, He sent Mrs. Couture to us through Audrey’s 5th grade teacher all those years ago.  He knew then that Christmas would not be Christmas until that moment when Chistmas begins… !

About Audrey

Audrey McClelland has been a digital influencer since 2005. She’s a mom of 5 and shares tips on her three favorite things: parenting, fashion and beauty. She’s also a Contemporary Romance Author.

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8 Comments

  1. 12.25.09
    Victoria said:

    This post is beautiful and making me cry. Thank you for sharing this lovely story and the Christmas tradition that started 20+ years ago!

  2. 12.25.09

    Oh my goodness, Sharon. This is beautiful. You are touching lives more than you know. My Mom and I talk about you, how much you mean to us, how kind you are, even though we only know you “virtually”.

    Bless you and Mrs. Couture! (And what a fabulous name.)

    Steph

  3. 12.25.09

    Lovely and touching and bless you for keeping here in your lives. I am sure she feels blessed that you are always there, each Christmas

  4. 12.26.09

    I don’t know if it’s true or not, but I see Mrs. Couture as being a lot like Flo. You touch so many lives Sharon. I hope you know how special you are to so many people.

  5. 12.26.09
    Alli said:

    What a sweet story and a wonderful tradition. I’m certain your family has touched the Couture’s life just as her family has touched yours over the years…
    And what a fantastic idea by Audrey’s teacher!
    xo

  6. 12.26.09
    Lisa said:

    What a beautiful story. Thanks so much for sharing it, Sharon. Merry Christmas!

  7. 12.26.09
    Erin said:

    I love her name! And I love the way you were brought together with her. This makes me think that when I return to work, I should find a similar program for my 8th graders… because you just never know what connections might be made!

  8. 12.26.09

    Oh Sharon, this is such a heartwarming post. How special to start your Christmas in such a way. You are one of a kind my friend. I received the very special Christmas card in the mail today from y0u. I almost cried! I felt such a warmth when opening it. The 9 angelic faces on the card made my day!

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