Tomorrow I will be 28 years old.
To some, that is young. To others, it is old (I know it was to me 10 years ago).
I’ve always tended to look at my age in comparison to others in my family. Not as a good or bad comparison, per se… just as kind of an interesting, anthropological (if you will) look at the differences and similarities.
When my Mom turned 28 years old, for example, she was just one month away from giving birth to me, her youngest child. She had had Audrey two and a half years prior. And she had married my Dad four years prior, gaining 2 young step-sons, my older brothers, in the process.
I remember being a little girl and asking my Mom how old she was when she had me. 28 seemed, quite frankly… old. And yet, here I am, less than 12 hours from turning that very age, and in some ways, I still feel like that little girl.
I simply cannot imagine myself, at this point in my life, having 3 children, about to give birth to my 4th.
Really, I can’t even imagine myself with one child.
I know that may seem odd, given that I’ll be celebrating my 4th wedding anniversary one month from tomorrow. I’m past the newlywed stage, it’s time to start procreating, right?
I’ve gotta be honest here… I’m just not ready. I obviously l-o-v-e my nieces and nephews beyond words. I love being with them, playing with them, talking with them, taking pictures of them, watching them grow… I am in no way, shape or form anti-kid. I’m just not ready for the responsibility of having my own yet.
You know what I did on Sunday morning? I slept until 9:30 AM. I didn’t have to escape my house to do this. I didn’t have to hire a babysitter. I just felt like not waking up until then… and I didn’t have to. I liked that feeling.
When I am done with work for the day, sometimes I go to the gym. Sometimes I grab dinner with friends. Sometimes I just go right home and watch television on my couch. I don’t have to tend to anyone’s schedule or needs but my own. I’m not ready to give that up just yet.
I’m happy with my role as “dog mom” at Mom Generations. Some people don’t take the whole “pet parent” thing seriously, but I do. My dogs make my world a better place. And giving them all the love in my heart brings me so much joy. I buy them birthday presents. I bring them to work with me. I dress them up at Halloween. I wouldn’t take a holiday photo without them in it. They’re not just my dogs. They are my best friends, my children, my life. I don’t care what anyone says, my love for them will never change… even when I do have human kids.
Yes, I do want kids eventually. There is no question about it. I clearly won’t be done having them by the time I’m 28, like my Mom, but that’s OK. Times have changed. I have a lot of friends my age who are just getting married now.
So let’s revisit this in 2 years, on the eve of me turning 30. We’ll see where I am on the having kids front. That’ll give me 2 more years of sleeping until 9:30 AM on Sunday mornings. Maybe by then I’ll be ready to give that up!?
